Friday, January 29, 2010

Katdishionary!** Part 2


**Read this really fast in your head:
Katdishionary is the intellectual property of Steph at the Red Clay Diaries (hereinafter referred to as SOTRCD). Reference herein to any specific commercial product, process, service by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, or otherwise, does not constitute or imply its endorsement, recommendation, or favoring by SOTRCD or any entities thereof. The views and opinions of the originators expressed therein do not necessarily state or reflect those of the HLAC, SOTRCD, FOTTSP, TWSS or any agency or entities thereof.


Katdishionary – (pronounced ka-di-shun-ary)

Definition: A collection of made up words providing endless blog fodder.

Origin: comment from Steph at the Red Clay Diaries from the first installment of this never-ending series:

“I have to share a brainstorm that came to me in the car, on my way to Starbucks.

The Katdish Dictionary is a nice name for the service you're providing. But a better name would be:


THE KATDISHIONARY.

You can pay me my standard branding fee later.”

(see also badgertastic)

Fatassitosis – (pronounced fat-as-si-to-sis)


Definition: A mutant strain of a virus scientists claim to have recently discovered. Their findings state that obesity can be "caught" as easily as a common cold from other people's coughs, sneezes and dirty hands. The condition has been linked to a highly-infectious virus which causes sniffles and sore throats.

Origin: HLAC’s breaking news story – This just in: I’m not fat, I just have a butt cold!

Kadonkadonk (pronounced ka-don-ka-donk)


Definition: what Sherri's butt says when she walks.

Origin: (see Fatassitosis)

Example: Sherri said: I've been a cold sufferer for years now.

God must have been handing out lots of ample rears in the sixties.
My sister and I got a matching set.
Our sickness was contacted at birth and runs in our Italian family.

I could weigh 79 lbs. and my rear would still be doing the kadonkadonk when I walk.

* I wear lots of long shirts, blazers, etc. to insure proper coverage.

Big AL calls mine the "mystery butt". No one has seen it in years!!!!


Badonkadonk – (pronounced ba-don-ka-donk)


Definition: What Steph’s butt says when she walks.

Origin: (see also fatassitosis)

Example: Steph says: ANOTHER way we are alike. Only my butt says badonkadonk. My sister and I could both weigh next-to-nothing and still have lots of cushioning. My sister was once told by an African-American girl that her butt was awfully big for a white person's.

Italian blood here too.

( ) ( ) ( )


Hmmm…That’s a considerable word count for a post about big butts. Kewl.

And now, let's sing, shall we?


17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now that is the best version of that song I've heard!

And if I understand correctly... letting someone sneeze on my butt is not good?

I may as well just confess now... I have a bony butt... can I still play with you guys?

katdish said...

Sure thing Bridget. Annie's got a bony butt, and we let her play.

Glynn said...

If there's one thing I've learned, it's never comment about certain feminine features. So...no comment, not even to say this is the start of a monumental best-seller.

By the way, someone told me you have now trademarked "Gaaa!"

~*Michelle*~ said...

This is hilarious.....

hmmmmm........as I get older and gravity is now bringing my butt closer to my thighs, I don't have that smooth swaying shake when I walk.....I am guessing it gives more of a chunk-and-klunk-junk-in-the-trunk motion now. *sigh*

*this was a great motivation for me to dust off my 30 Day Shred DVD.

Annie K said...

I'm the anomaly in the FOTTSP universe Bridget.

Stephanie Wetzel said...

So now you're mining your comments for katdishionary material? Wow, I'd better go back and delete some of mine...

Oh who am I kidding? I love that I'm the featured badonkadonk today.

From now on, I'm gonna bring my A game every time I comment.

Badgertastic!

Gina said...

I know y'all don't know me but I'm a soul sister with the whole butt thing. First, my maiden name was BURT. In the 70's there was a song about the Butt Sisters. Me and my two sisters also have "outstanding" butts, so we were called the Butt Sisters. I was Bella, my sisters were Bertha and Bathsheba. (We are white, BTW).

Beck said...

HEHEHEHEH.
I have relatively little in the way of a butt - although compared to my mother's family, I am bodaciously-bootyed, since the whole group of them fail to have a butt between them.

Maureen said...

I imagine a beach . . . .

Hilarious!

60 Minutes once did a story about women at Black Sea resorts. It must have had an advance copy of the Katdishionary. The views were unforgettable.

Helen said...

Thank you, Katdish. The best part of this was the hymn to Fat Bottomed Girls done by the all male choir. And since I am the biggest bottomed gal here, I feel safe to assume that they were singing praises to me. Me likey. ;-)
Maybe I should sing a song for them...How does "Play That Funky Music, Whiteboy" grab you?

Marni said...

Back in college, my husband called my butt his "little onion...so sweet, it made him cry". Now, after 2 kids and too many bags of Cheetos, she ain't what she used to be. Or maybe I caught a cold. I used to work in education and we all know public schools are breeding grounds for gross germs.

I love "katdishonary". It's like I'm slurring. I'm not allowed to slur anymore since finding Jesus.

Unknown said...

Hope I don't catch it - but this "kadonkadonk" is awful fun to say! :p

Anonymous said...

I'll fit right in!

jasonS said...

Funny post, but I don't know how I feel about you making me focus on various women's butts. For shame, Katdish, for shame... :)

Sarah Salter said...

Yeah, I fit right in with this crowd. My college friend, Phillip, used to call me "Bootylicious."

Laura said...

I am laughing so hard I'm making noises that might have to be added to the Katdishionary!


I'm kinda with Michelle--this body doesn't make that sexy swish swish...I shudder to think what it sounds like in realtime.

You are too funny!

Sherri Murphy said...

Love to know that my ample rear has made it into the infamous Katdishionary. You've now taken the mystery, out of my mystery butt! Thanks. People know.