Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Pardon Me while I Rant incessantly...


I don't believe in karma, feng shui, ying and yang or any of that other tree hugging, crystal gripping hippie crap. But sometimes when a series of unfortunate events seem to get all bunched together, I feel the need to get my cranky ho on and gripe a little.

Do you see where this is going? I think you do...

Sunday afternoon, we drove our daughter to her very first girl scout camping adventure: horse camp. She was a bit teary eyed the night before, but once we arrived at camp and she realized that she would be bunking with most of her brownie troop, she relaxed and gave us all (including her older brother whom she had just informed she would not miss) a smile, kiss and big hug goodbye.

Anyone who has any experience with Girl Scouts understands that the key to any enjoyable camping trip is copious amounts of paperwork filled out by the girls' parents before said trip. Presidential pardons have been granted with less paperwork. Can I get a witness, Beth? (Editor's note: I should point out that the "Beth" I am referring to is geeky church planter Beth. As it seems there is a plethora of Beths that read this blog. But I digress...)

I spent the better part of 2 days searching for the necessary documentation to assure the Girl Scout Gestapo that my 7 year old daughter did not pose a threat to herself or others at horse camp. I even brought all the paperwork on a clipboard, just in case I filled out something wrong. (I did, but it was a minor infraction.) The only thing I did not complete, BECAUSE SOMEONE FORGOT TO PUT IT IN MY PACKET was the camp physical release form to be signed by our family physician.

Again, do you see where this is going? Uh, huh. Thought so...

The camp director was kind enough to allow our daughter to stay at the camp overnight, provided we have our doctor's office fill out the form and fax it to the camp the following morning.

Early yesterday morning, I drove the 20 miles from my house to our GP and presented the form to the receptionist, who in turn informed me that my daughter had not had a physical in two years, and the doctor would not sign the form. Sucktacular.

Guess who drove 70 miles to pick up her daughter at camp, drove 70 miles back to the doctor's office, waited impatiently for the doctor (whose time is apparently WAY more valuable than mine), got the stupid form signed, then drove another 70 miles, dropped off her daughter at camp AGAIN, filled up her gas guzzling non-environmental friendly SUV with gas, then drove (you guessed it - 70 miles) back home?

That would be yours truly. All I want to know is, WHO FORGOT TO PUT THAT STUPID FORM IN MY PACKET?!?

I promise, I forgive you. But I want to punch you in the neck!

In Christian love, of course...always in love.

P.S. - Driving on Interstate 45 at 5:00 pm on a Monday? Don't EVEN get me started....

22 comments:

Wendy said...

If only you could learn to express your anger...

Stacey said...

Oh, I-45! It's a nightmare. I must say the only road I hate more is the ridiculous I-10! I know, I know - "hate" is a strong word, but I mean it.

Joanne Sher said...

Ooooohhh man! SOOOOO sorry! (you're a good mom, by the way.)

Billy Coffey said...

I agree with Wendy. You really should learn to be more vocal about what you're feeling. Bottling up all those emotions isn't good for you.

But you do get major Mommy points for doing that.

Nitewrit said...

Don't get me started on this kind of thing...no, I won't, don't need to...I leave it to you, you express it well.

Larry E.

Kelly said...

I-45 enough said. I was never so glad when we moved from that area and I didn't have to travel it anymore except the rare trip to my inlaws.

Candace Jean July 16 said...

So what's your point? OK, I'll cave and give you Mommy of the Year. You deserve it.

Breathe, Katdish, Breathe. Dare I tell you these situations will become more frequent and filled with more drama as your kids get older? Naw, you can find out for yourself. My shoulder will be here when you need it.

Steph @Red Clay Diaries said...

I'm with those who said you earned major Mommy Points for that.

My daughter desperately wanted to attend Girl Scout Camp after she got the brochure at school. We cruelly refused. Oh, did I forget to mention that she's NOT IN GIRL SCOUTS?

You are a Mommy Superhero. She-Ra of the Carpool Line.

Annie K said...

I probably would have left a path of death and kidney punches. But that is just me...

You're way more self controlled than I am.

Helen said...

I'm so sorry. It stinks that they forgot the form. I understand why the form is important....which is why it should have been the form MOST likely to be included in the packet, rather than the least....

sherri said...

I'd say a man was behind it.

Beth said...

Oh...camp paperwork. Processing all that paper is extra fun. We seriously TRIED to streamline some of the paperwork at the council I worked at...but it was difficult considering all the safety requirements. Have you ever read Safetywise??? A whole book dedicated to the paranoia of "what might happen". But I promise you the paperwork for Boy Scouts is worse.

Then there's Dr.'s offices....my own father is a physician and I pretty much hate the medical community. It's the system, though, not the individuals. I have thought many times to do my own rant on these woes, but I doubt I could restrain myself from saying something I shouldn't.

And Steph, they purposefully try to get non-Girl Scouts to go to summer camp. It gives girls new to the program a good first GS experience and it's one of the best ways to boost the numbers at the end of the membership year.

Beth said...

Sherri, I've met men that work full time for Girl Scouts. They are usually very strange. But my bet is that they had an intern or senior citizen stuffing the packets...

Nick the Geek said...

I would trade you all of that if you had put up with my MIL for 2 weeks instead of me. Sorry I think my compassion circuit is temporarily shorted out.

Jewda said...

You sound a lot like my mom, and yet so different. She certainly would have done the runaround like you, but instead of neck punching, she'd convulsively cry. Then she'd send a tear stained letter to someone high in the organization and express her anger. Oh, and one other major difference: it wouldn't have been girl scouts. I was never in that.

Lanette said...

So first time posting here, and just have to say you crack me up. I'd tell you things get better, but having two daughters ages 16 and 12......well nope. Paperwork for church camp and I had to drive mine an hour and a half to and from camp because she had to go to traffic court and couldn't leave with the rest of the kids for camp (missed the van by two hours!) Love your blog!

Marni said...

Sherri...SNORT! That's so what I was thinking. Or a teenager maybe.

I'm sorry you got caught up in red tape. I hate that crap. Everyone is so scared of being sued, reason and trust has left the building.

If you think Girl Scout paperwork is bad (and it is, I've been there), girl, wait until you deal with FAFSA and getting your kids finances all straight for college. Some of the biggest morons I've dealt with in my life have been in the last 3 months in getting Lindsay all set for college. I've taken up recreational cussing again...

jasonS said...

It was the devil. He sneaked in and pulled the form out while you weren't looking. Of course it was the devil who invented all the forms in the first place. The devil is a bureaucrat (which sounds like a nice name for an album).

The Homefront said...

I definitely vote you Mother of the Year. Let us know when you figure out who to share your Christian love-via-neck punch with.

BeckeyZ said...

You're a good Mommy, katdish.

Now, seriously, tell us how you REALLY feel.

~*Michelle*~ said...

Yowch!

Agreeing with everyone on lots

Great mama

Sorry that it happened

You really should learn how to let us know how you really feel next time, though.

ps. I did laugh out loud on "sucktacular"

Chris Sullivan said...

When it rains it pours